PUPPY LOVE PT. 2 ..

AFTER A SATURDAY AFTERN00N CONVERSATI0N I WAS SENT THIS IN A MESSAGE; SPECIAL .. JUST FOR ME .. & I C0ULDN'T KEEP IT T0GETHER .. I C0ULDN'T HELP BUT LAUGH .. I D0NT KN0W WHAT I SH0ULD HAVE FELT AT THAT EXACT M0MENT .. SH0ULD I HAVE FELT MY GAGG REFLEX GETTING THE BEST 0F ME ?? 0R THAT STRANGE FEELING Y0U GET WHEN YOU SEE A D0G WITH N0 TEETH, 0NE LEG, & N0 TAIL & Y0U STILL SAY "AWWWWWWW" .. HAS THIS PUPPY L0VE TURNED INT0 A RETARDED PUPPY L0VE ?? MY B00 IS S0 SPECIAL !!

Y0U N0T EATIN'IT ..

YOU N0T EATIN'EAT! V0L 1 IS AN OVAH EXPERIENCE BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE LATELESS CALIEL CRACKPIPE. THIS MIXTAPE INCLUDES CHANTS THAT WILL HAVE ANY BALL H0T FOR DAYS. BEATS & V0CALS ARE C0MBINED T0 LET THE GURRRLS G0 THE FUCK 0FF, S0 DUCK WALK BITCH!

THIS MIXTAPE INCLUDES THE 0VAH CHANTS SUCH AS, "WHERE THE GURRRLS AT?", "I HEARD Y0U WAS EDIBLE?", & "FUCK THR0WING SHADE!" AS WELL AS THE BANJI TRACKS, "MANEATER" & "ITS YO CHIN IMA CHECK!" L00K F0R IT 0N MYSPACE THIS SUMMER. C0MING T0 A PIER NEAR Y0U!

PUPPY L0VE

MYSPACE IS A TRIP. I SAY THIS BECAUSE THAT SHIT HAS GOT DUDES FROM GERMANY TRYNA SPIT GAME TO ME LIKE, "YOU CUTE. YOU YAH00?" I JUST CANT TAKE IT. THIS IS MY CURRENT PR0JECT. M0H THE DANCER. MUSLIM, T0P, GAY, AVERAGE FACE, WITH AN ENGLISH LEVEL SIMILAR T0 TH0SE KIDS I USED T0 MAKE FUN 0F IN ESL.

0UR C0NVERSATI0NS ARE FUNNY. ARE CYBERSEX IS FUNNIER. AFTER AB0UT A M0NTH 0R S0 0F BACK & F0RTH WE ARE INVESTED INT0 EACH 0THER 0N A FRIENDLY LEVEL. I WILL ENJ0Y THIS GAME UNTIL IT ENDS WHICH IS S00N BECAUSE THE LAST TIME WE CHATTED HE SAID I TALK TOO MUCH.

A GAME CALLED CATCHUP ..

I AM OVER THE WH0LE IDEA 0F BL0GGING SINCE N0 0NE IS QUITE CATCHING 0N T0 THE FUCKING CRACK THAT I SPIT 0N THE REGULAR. IM WINDING D0WN THESE P0STS UNTIL THE SUMMER WHEN I PLAN 0N PUTTING 0UT A MIXTAPE, A TEAM BL0G (MAYBE), & C0LLEGE. UGH ! GRADUATI0N, PR0M, & MY LIFES TYPICAL BULLSHIT HAS TAKEN UP THE MAJORITY OF MY TIME. I AM WRITTING ALMOST EVERYDAY. I HAVE MADE FRIENDS WITH PEOPLE WH0 WILL ADD S0ME SICKENING FLAVA T0 MY SUMMER. PE0PLE WH0 ACTUALLY HIT ME UP 0N FACEB00K IM LIKE "H0W Y0U D0ING?" I CANT TAKE IT. T0 BE L0VED, T0 BE L0VED, 0H WHAT A FEELING ..





I F0UGHT D0WN LIKE A BANJI 0N 141 & LEX (IT WAS N0T MY FAULT BUT THAT CHR0NICLE WILL C0NTINUE LATER)MY HEART HAS BEEN 0FFICIALLY BR0KEN & I HAVE C0ME T0 THE REALIZATI0N THAT EXPECTED PAIN HURTS S0 MUCH M0RE THAN UNEXPECTED PAIN. I COULD HVE PROTECTED MYSELF. I SHOULD HAVE PR0TECTED MYSELF. SUMMER IS ON THE HORIZON.

GIMME A BEAT ..

FR0M N0W 0N I CHANT D0WN AT ANY EVENT THAT HAS 2 0R M0RE CUNTS IN ATTENDANCE .. I PLAN 0N BEC0MING A H0USE MEMBER BEF0RE THE NEXT LATEX BALL .. WERRRK THAT GIFT CUNT ..

MIXTAPE ? ..

"DID I MENTI0N THAT A LAME CANT HAVE ME BEG MY PARD0N .. I 0NLY FUCK WITH
CUNTS & A-LIST STARTERS .. PUMPIN DOWN S0ME PAVEMENT FACE BEAT DOWN RETARDED .. HATERS P0PPIN SHIT GET T0SSED 0UT LIKE GARBAGE .. " -- R.CALIEL

"HE CALL ME MANEATER .. & HE MY BAGELBITE .. I PUT THIS PUDDY 0N'EM .. BECAUSE ITS S0 TIGHT .. I RIDE IT ALL NIGHT .. HIS PIPE GAME IS S0 RIGHT .. I FUCK HIM THEN I LEAVE'EM ..THAT SHIT IS S0 TRIFE" -- R.CALIEL

I WANAN C0ME 0UT WITH S0ME BANGY CUNT ASS MIXTAPE THIS SUMMER 0N S0ME REAL SHIT .. I D0NT HAVE THE TIME T0 MAKE G0ALS THAT WILL NEVER GET ACC0MPLISHED .. THATS JUST N0T ME .. S0; L00K 0UT F0R THAT CUNT MASTER MIXTAPE THIS SUMMER .. IM H0PING T0 HAVE SEVEN TRACKS C0MPLETED BY PRIDE S0 I CAN HAND IT 0UT T0 THE LATE CUNTS AT THE PIER .. ITS ALL L0VE TH0UGH ..

DREAM BIG ..

THE TRI0 RESP0NSIBLE F0R MY M0ST RECENT EARGASM .. I CANT TAKE THE STYLE/V0CALS/S0UL 0F THIS UK BREED WEAP0N 0F MASS MUSICAL DESTRUCTI0N .. LYRICS THAT TICKLE Y0UR S0UL WHILE LEAVING Y0U GAGA 0N THE DANCEFL00R .. THE N0ISETTES ARE DEF AN INDIE BAND T0 WATCH 0UT F0R .. I HAVENT BEEN THIS INTRIGUED SINCE THE DEBUT 0F JANELLE M0NAE & WH0 KN0WS WHERE THAT BITCH IS .. LETS JUST H0PE THIS BAND HAS S0ME M0RE STAYING P0WER ..

FEELIN CUNT ..

LETS TAKE A TRIP BACK IN TIME .. WHERE IT WASNT AB0UT THE DIP .. WHEN IT WAS AB0UT THE FUCKING PERF0RMANCE .. CURRENTLY TAKING A V0GUING HIATUS ..

MAKING A SCENE ..

UGH .. THIS S0NG MAKES LIFE SEEM W0RTH IT AGAIN ..


Fritz Helder And The Phantoms - Making A Scene (promo) from J T I on Vimeo.

LIFE LIKE IT IS ..

T0DAY I RECEIVED MY REJECTI0N LETTER FR0M THE FASHI0N INSTITUTE 0F TECHN0L0GY .. I THANK THE CHAIR 0F THE MENSWEAR DEPT. F0R SPARING ME THE HUMILIATI0N .. MY TALENT JUST WASNT THERE .. I WASNT READY .. BUT I STILL CANT SHAKE THE FEELING THAT I HAVE SHAMED ALL THE PE0PLE WH0 SAW THE LITTLE TALENT I WAS W0RKING WITH & BELIEVED IN ME .. PARDON ME BUT I JUST CANT HELP BUT GAG .. FASHI0N IS LIKE EVERY DUDE I HAVE FUCKED WITH .. L0NG DREAMY NIGHTS FILLED WITH AN EARLY M0RNING RUDE AWAKENING .. WHEN Y0U HIT A BUMP PUMP .. BACK T0 THE DRAWING B0ARD .. IF ALL THE DESIGNERS 0F THE W0RLD DIED 0F A TRAGIC ILLNESS & I WAS LEFT UNT0UCHED .. I W0ULD BE THE BIGGEST P0SER EVER & DR0WN MYSELF IN THE BATHTUB .. THATS H0W BAD I NEED IT ..

IM S0 FRAGILE ..

GREY GARDENS IS A 1975 D0CUMENTARY THAT DEPICTS THE LIVES 0F EDITH "BIG EDIE" EWING BOUVIER BEALE & HER DAUGHTER EDITH "LITTLE EDIE" BOUVIER BEALE; THE AUNT & FIRST COUSIN OF JACQUELINE KENNEDY ONASSIS. THE M0THER & DAUGHTER DU0 LIVED IN SQUAL0R AT GREY GARDENS, A 28-R00M MANSI0N AT 3 WEST END AVENUW IN THE WEALTH GE0RGICA P0ND NEIGHB0RH00D 0F EAST HAMPT0N, NEW Y0RK.

THEY LIVED IN T0TAL IS0LATI0N FR0M THE REST 0F THE W0RLD IN A S0RT 0F UNT0UCHED TIME CAPSULE WHICH WAS ONCE A LAVISH ESTATE THAT SL0WLY BECAME DECREPIT. THIS TRIP INT0 THEIR N0T T00 REAL REALITY PR0VES H0W FRAGILE THE HUMAN MIND CAN BE. I AM DIEING T0 WATCH THE REMAKE.

I JUST DIED IN Y0UR ARMS T0NIGHT ..

"MY LASHES ARE S0 DRY .. FR0M THE TEARS THAT I CRIED .. JUST THINKING THAT Y0U JUST MIGHT NEVER BE THERE .. WHERE CAN I REST MY HEAD .. WHEN I GET S0 SCARED .. WHEN LIFE GETS ME D0WN .. WHEN I RUN INT0 MY MIND & FEAR IS ALL AR0UND .. WHEN I REST MY HEAD .. WILL Y0U BE THERE ? " -- R. CALIEL

WHAT AB0UT A LIFE LINE ?

0KAY; S0 LETS JUST SAY IM 0N CASH CAB & I D0NT KN0W WHAT YEAR THE ALVIN AILEY DANCE C0MPANY WAS F0UNDED, 0R I D0NT KN0W H0W MANY HIT SINGLES BJ0RK HAS HAD, 0R I CANN0T NAME EVERY EXP0RT T0 C0ME 0UT 0F JAMAICA, 0R WHAT RES0LUTI0N L00KS BEST 0N A CAMERA , 0R I F0RG0T THE CH0RE0 F0R R00M SERVICE, 0R I NEED A QUICK SPANISH TUT0RIAL, 0R JUST A HEALTHY LAUGH .. I CAN USE THESE BITCHES AS A M0THER FUCKING LIFE LINE .. BUT THEY MEAN S0 MUCH M0RE THEN THAT; CAUSE THEY MY CREW I GUESS .. & I L0VE THEM .. D0WN ..









BUT WE ALL KN0W WH0SES THE HEART 0F THIS SHIT .. BUT JUST IN CASE Y0U F0RG0T .. HERE IS A REMINDER H0NEY .. GET IN



(N0TE: N0, N0T EVERY0NE IS PICTURED IN THIS P0ST & I LIKE THE GRAINY TINT 0N THESE PICTURES CAUSE IT GIVES A DATED L00K)

FUCK THAT BULLSHIT .. I WANT T0 DANCE !!

YESSS H0NEY G0 THE FUCK 0FF .. I D0NT KN0W WHERE THIS NEW F0RM 0F DANCE CALLED WACKING CAME FR0M BUT IT GIVES A L00K .. H0WEVER, V0GUING IS THE SICKEST F0RM 0F DANCE IN MY EYES HANDS D0WN .. THIS VIDE0 WAS JUST T00 CUTE TH0UGH .. THE EDITING IS FUCKING A+ GRADE ..

MARIC0N

THE BEST SH0RT FILM I HAVE EVER C0ME ACR0SS ..

THE C0L0R 0F HUMANITY ..

I WANNA BE IN A H0USE .. I WANNA LIVE

THE NEW C0LLECTI0N ..

Little White Roses - Paul & Price

IF IT WAS A S0UND .. IT W0ULD S0UND LIKE THIS ..

H0ME SWEET H0ME ..

INTERVIEW 0N THURSDAY .. WISH ME LUCK ..

UPDATE: THE M0ST MEM0RABLE QU0TES FR0M MY INTERVIEW WITH THE CHAIR 0F THE MENSWEAR DEPT. AT FIT WH0 I HAVE BEEN INTERNING UNDER SINCE SEPTEMBER W0ULD HAVE T0 BE, "ARE Y0U SELLING ATTITUDE 0R GARMENTS?" & "I CANT EVEN PICTURE THE PATTERNS F0R THESE DESIGNS, & I MAKE EXCELLENT PATTERNS." S0 BASICALLY IM FUCKED .. H0NESTLY & TRULY. THE PE0PLE WH0 WENT IN AFTER ME TIPPED LIKE IT WAS FASHI0N WEEK, LIKE I GAGGED. THEY MADE MY DRESS SHIRT & BANANA REPUBLIC CARDIGAN PAIRED WITH SKINNIES L00K LIKE THE B0TTOM 0F THE BARREL FROM AN OLD NAVY CLEARANCE AISLE. I JUST DONT EVEN WANNA THINK/TALK ABOUT .. JUST PUMP ..

D0 Y0U N0MI?

KLAUS N0MI IS THE MALE EQUIVALENT 0F LADY GAGA. WELL, LADY GAGA IS ACTUALLY THE MALE EQUIVALENT OF KLAUS NOMI. THE DIFFERENCE; INSTEAD 0F THE T0UCH 0F TRASH GLAM0UR KLAUS HAS A DAB 0F CLASSICAL 0PERA IN HIS V0CALS. HE IS INFAM0US F0R HIS THEATRICAL PERFORMANCES, HIGHLY STYLIZED HAIRDO WHICH FLAUNTED A RECEDING HAIRLINE, HEAVY MAKE-UP,& EXTRAVAGANT COSTUMES. HE WAS ONE OF THE FIRST CELEBRITIES TO CONTACT AIDS WHICH ENDED HIS LIFE IN 1983.

GET INT0 MY NEW ID0L WH0 I KN0W VERY LITTLE AB0UT; N0T A DAMN THING BUT I INTEND 0N WATCHING A FILM MADE AB0UT HIS LIFE F0R FUTURE REFERENCES. LANA & I ARE IN A HEATED DEBATE BECAUSE SHE THINKS KLAUS N0MI IS N0T THAT 0VAH WHILE I FEEL THAT KLAUS N0MI IS THE DEFINITI0N 0F 0VAHNESS. SEE/HEAR F0R Y0URSELF ..

I LIVE F0R Y0U; & 0NLY Y0U ..

G0D BLESS THE CHILD ..

MISTER SIRIAN0 Y0U JUST A BAD BITCH .. THIS C0LLECTI0N JUST GAVE ME EVERYTHING & THE FACT THAT IT "FEELS" VERY SIMILAR T0 THE C0LLECTI0N IM SH0WING AT MY FIT INTERVIEW MAKES ME FEEL A BIT RELEVANT S0 S0ME 0F THE NERVE HAS BEEN REM0VED .. I WISH I W0ULD HAVE SEEN THIS SH0W 0VER D0MENIC0 VACCA CAUSE IT JUST FELT BREATHTAKING .. UNDERSTATED 0PULENCE .. I LIVE F0R THAT PHRASE ..

ALL THE WAY LIVE ..

I REALLY D0NT BELIEVE I FIT IN WELL WITH MY CURRENT ERA. I D0NT THINK I WAS MEANT T0 BE B0RN WHEN I WAS. (DAMN MY M0THER & TEENAGE PREGNANCY) WATCHING THESE 0LD CLIPS 0F S0UL TRAIN 0N Y0UTUBE HAS REALLY G0T ME THINKING, "DAMN, IM A FUCKING CHILD OF THE 70'S." I JUST W0ULD HAVE FIT RIGHT IN WITH THE M00D, MUSIC, & STYLE 0F THE ERA. I REALLY FEEL LIKE LIFE HAS CHEATED ME. I W0ULD HAVE VIBED IN THE 70'S .. PLAYED IN THE 80'S .. SETTLED D0WN IN THE 90'S .. & DIED 0F A DRUG 0VERD0SE 3 YEARS AG0 .. I CAN DIG IT ..

HELL0 S0UL MATE; G00DBYE HEARTACHE ..

"0H H0W Y0U SET MY S0UL 0N FIRE .. & I W0NT ASK WHY; BECAUSE TO KN0W IS N0T 0NE 0F MY DESIRES .. JUST TAKE ME T0 THE T0P 0F A RAIN F0REST CAN0PY & HAVE Y0UR WAY WITH ME .. DEV0UR MY FRUITS AS I SAMPLE YOUR H0NEY SEEDS .. LAUGHING GENTLY LIKE A HIVE 0F BUMBLE BEES .. AS I RUN MY FINGERS THR0UGH Y0UR C0ARSE HAIR .. WE JUST W0NT CARE .. MAKE ME SMILE A SWEET & PASSI0NATE SMILE .. S0METHING DEVINE & TRUE .. AS I L00K DEEP INT0 Y0UR EYES .. DEEPER .. & DEEPER .. AS TIME PASSES BY BETWEEN ME & YOU .." -- R. CALIEL ..

HE IS N0T WHAT IM TYPICALLY USED T0 FALLING F0R BUT THEN AGAIN I NEVER HAD A "TYPE" SET IN ST0NE .. D0NT EVER LET ME BUMP INT0 Y0U 0N THE FASHION INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY CAMPUS 0R A L0CAL CAFE CAUSE I JUST MIGHT HAVE T0 ENTERTAIN Y0U F0R A MINUTE WITH A C0NVERATI0N AB0UT ASTR0L0GY & S0UL MATES .. A CHILDISH CRUSH ..

I WAS B0RN WITH IT ..

I WAS B0RN WITH ..

FUNK
P0ERTY
THEATRICS
ART
DESIGN
LUST
DRUGS
FASHI0N
ANIME
H0M0 ER0TICA
& SUGAR CANE

CAUSE ITS IN MY BL00D
S0 LET ME DIE WITH IT

FASHI0N WEEK ..

N0 INVITE; N0 PR0BLEM .. EAT Y0UR HEART 0UT ..

F00D F0R TH0UGHT ..

"Fashion has become a joke. The designers have forgotten that there are women inside the dresses. Most women dress for men and want to be admired. But they must also be able to move, to get into a car without bursting their seams! Clothes must have a natural shape." - Coco Chanel

SNATCHED ..

I HAVE BEC0ME S0 VAIN .. L0RD D0NT LET ME DR0P AN0THER P0UND CAUSE I JUST C0ULDNT TAKE ME .. 0NCE A THICK GURRRLS SNATCHED THAT BITCH IS G0NE F0REVER .. I C0ULDNT BUTT0N THIS C0AT IN 0CT0BER .. IT JUST W0ULDNT .. THANK Y0U & G00D NIGHT ..

LITTLE DRAG0N ..

I NEVER HEARD A S0NG THAT MADE ME CRY WHILE SMILING .. JUST THINKING AB0UT S0 MUCH IN SUCH A SMALL AM0UNT 0F TIME .. & THEN I HEARD THIS & I FINALLY LIVED THR0UGH MY EARS & BREATHED THR0UGH MY S0UL .. FEELING RATHER FREE ..

TAKE ME .. TAKE ME .. BACK ..

"WHAT IS Y0UTH BUT A FORGOTTEN TRUTH THAT BURNS INSIDE US LIKE A FIRE? WHAT IS YOUTH TO THOSE WHO HAVE IT BUT AN UNWANTED DESIRE? THE FLAME IS DRAWN BUT BURNS OUT QUICK TO THOSE WHO DO NOT REQUIRE. WHAT IS YOUTH TO A FAST RUNNING CHILD BUT AN IDEA SIMPLY PERSPIRED." -- R. CALIEL

I MISS P0ETRY LIKE THIS .. SIMPLE, VIVID, ARTICULATE, & PASSI0NATE .. ITS N0T OVERBEARING, THEATRICAL, TYPICAL, PACKAGED, 0R REAL .. ITS JUST SM00TH, REAL SM00TH



N0W HIGH SCH00L IS G0NE LIKE A DRAWN 0UT MESSY MEM0RY THAT I W0ULD HATE T0 RELIVE CAUSE IM M0VING 0N T0 BIGGER & BETTER THINGS. I HAVE LEARNED THINGS IN THE CLASSR00M AS WELL AS 0UTSIDE THE CLASSR00M. I HAVE L0VED, FUCKED, DRANK, KISSED, FLIRTED, WR0TE, DRAWN, SEWN, CH0PPED, DANCED, CRIED, CRIED, CRIED, LAUGHED, SMILED, SERVED, WINCED, GAGGED, & EVEN F0UGHT .. BUT I HAVE NEVER F0RGIVEN .. & I WILL NEVER F0RGET .. S0; CHEERS T0 THE CLASS 0F '09 ..



WHAT IS HIGH SCH00L REALLY .. BUT A PICTURE IN A YEAR B00K ..

A KINDRED SPIRIT ..

MY L0VE

"My love has hair
Like midnight,
But midnight fades to dawn.
My love has eyes
Like starlight,
But starlight fades in morn.
My love has a voice
Like dew fall,
But dew-fall dies at a breath.
My love has love
Like life's all,
But life's all fades in death." -- RICHARD BRUCE NUGENT





RICHARD BRUCE NUGENT (1906-1987) WAS A WRITER, PAINTER, ILLUSTRATOR, & P0PULAR B0HEMIAN PERSONALITY WH0 LIVED & W0RKED AT THE CENTER 0F THE HARELEM RENAISSANCE. PR0TEGE OF THE WRITER, PHILOSOPHER, & EDUCAT0R ALAN LOCKE, ROOMMATE & LOVER TO WRITER WALLACE THURMAN, & CL0SE FRIENDS WITH THE B0TH LANGST0N HUGHES & Z0RA NEAL HURST0N NUGENT WAS THE 0NLY AFRICAN AMERICAN WRITER WILLING T0 CLEARLY INDICATE HIS H0M0SEXUALITY IN PRINT. T0GETHER THE GR0UP 0F AFRICAN AMERICAN INN0VAT0RS PRINTED A MAGAZINE CALLED FIRE!!

T0 FACILITATE THE EXPL0RATI0N 0F ISSUE IN THE BLACK C0MMUNITY THAT WERE N0T IN THE F0REFR0NT 0F MAINSTREAM AFRICAN AMERICAN S0CIETY SUCH AS H0M0SEXUALITY, BISEXUALITY, INTERRACIAL RELATI0NSHIPS, PR0MISCUITY, PR0STITUTI0N, & THE C0L0R PREJUDICE WITHIN THE BLACK RACE ITSELF. FIRE!! BR0UGHT T0 THE PUBLIC EYE ALL THE ISSUES THAT MANY TH0UGHT W0ULD TAINT THE M0VEMENT MANY NEGR0ES WERE PR0GRESSING T0WARDS AT THE TIME. T0GETHER THE WRITERS R00MED IN THE N0T0RI0US "NIGGERATTI MAN0R" AT 267 W 136TH STREET IN HARLEM , NEW Y0RK. I WANT T0 VISIT THE SITE JUST T0 BREATHE THERE. I W0NDER IF THE H0M0ER0TIC MURALS NUGENT PAINTED 0N THE WALLS STILL EXIST; I W0NDER IF THE BR0WN ST0NE STILL EXISTS ..

I AM CURRENTLY READING NUGENT'S C0NTRIBUTI0N T0 THE LANDMARK PUBLICATI0N FIRE!!; A C0MP0SITI0N CALLED, "SM0KE, LILIES, & JADE" .. HE DIED IN THE T0WN I WAS B0RN. H0B0KEN, NEW JERSEY. I W0NDER IF IT WAS THE SAME H0SPITAL. I FEEL A C0LLECTI0N C0MING T0GETHER . .

SP0KEN WERD ?

"& I NEVER HAD A HEART S0 THIS SHIT JUST D0NT M0VE ME .. EXCUSE ME F0R BEING THAT LITTLE B0Y Y0U HEARD AB0UT 0N THE NEWS .. HIS LIFE'S SCANDALS WRITTEN UP AND DIRECTED INT0 A M0VIE .. N0 MY M0THER C0ULDNT ALWAYS BE THERE T0 STAND UP AND DEFEND ME .. BUT WHAT M0THER REALLY IS .. LIKE A WALL IN A 0LD GUTTED 0UT BUILDING I HAVE ST0RIES .. AND IF THESE WALLS C0ULD TALK I W0ULD TELL AB0UT THE M0LESTATI0N, THE PAIN , & THE FALSE HIGHS 0F MY FATHER'S D0PE DEALING GLORY .. BUT JUST LIKE THESE WALLS MY M0UTH IS CONSTRUCTED, DEVELOPED, & PAINTED .. SHUT .. CAUSE AT THE END 0F THE DAY I WILL NOT BE AN0THER BREAKING STORY ON THE 10 0'CLOCK NEWS CAUSE PEOPLE JUST DONT GIVE A FUCK .. NOW ADMIT THAT YOU ARE HEARTLESS .. " I AINT D0NE ..

BEF0RE ANY BITCH WAS HARDC0RE ..

THERE WAS LIL KIM .. & 0NLY KIM. YA TRUE T0 THIS TAKE A SHIT IN YA UTERUS! GET A C N0TE EVERY TIME I DEEP THR0AT! I WANNA SEE IF Y0U CAN MAKE ME SCREAM I HATE Y0U .. I L0VE THIS CLIP. CALL ME A H00DRAT BUT I THINK IM JUST A BAD GIRL.

DAMN Y0U ..

I SWEAR I DESIGNED PIECES FR0M J0HN PAUL GAULTIER'S MENS 2009-2010 WINTER SH0W IN AN 0LD SKETCH B00K & I CANT TAKE THE FACT THAT WE SHARED A SEMI SIMILAR C0NCEPT AND HE BR0UGHT IT T0 LIFE .. HE NOT BEING ME IS THE GAGGER TH0UGH & I FEEL JEALOUS, STUPID, & BARREN. THE EXTRAVAGANT FR0 & BERET IS S0 R. CALIEL; ASK ANYBODY.

CH0P ..

IT SEEMS LIKE WHEN I GIVE A PERS0N THE CHANCE T0 GET INT0 ME .. LIKE IN THE PLACES MY CL0SEST FRIENDS HAVE N0 IDEA AB0UT .. THEY FUCK ME UP. I WILL NEVER F0RCE A FRIENDSHIP 0NT0 ANYB0DY CAUSE ITS '09 & PE0PLE JUST D0NT WANT T0 DEAL WITH ME .. S0 LETS MAKE IT SIMPLE & LEAVE ME THE HELL AL0NE, JUST A IDEA.

EH EH WHAT THE FUCK !!

YES; I KN0W A BITCH HAS BEEN G0NE F0R AGES. YES; I KN0W I D0NT KN0W SHIT AB0UT WHAT THE CURRENT STATE OF THE BL0G0SPHERE SERVES UP T0DAY. YES; MY BL0G IS A FLOP, CHOP, A HIT & A MISS. YES; I NEVER REALLY GAVE A FUCK & N0W YOU KN0W. H0WEVER, UNLIKE THE MAJ0RITY 0F THE THINGS IN MY LIFE THIS P0ST HAS A P0INT. IF Y0U KN0W MY TASTE Y0U C0ULD GUESS THAT I LIVE F0R LADY GAGA .. LIKE THIS BITCH HAS BEEN EVERYTHING TO ME SINCE JUST DANCE DROPPED. GET INT0 IT ..



BUT THIS SHIT .. THIS C0MMERCIAL BUBBLE GUM P0P SHIT IS HURTING MY FILLINGS. N0 GAGA D0NT G0 D0WN THAT R0AD CAUSE BITCH Y0U'LL BE PUMPING THERE WITH0UT THIS FAN ..

THE REALEST SHIT I EVER SPOKE ..

S0 ITS 7:04 IN THE M0RNING & I HAVENT BEEN T0 SLEEP .. ITS THE NEW YEAR & I CAN SEE THE LITTLE DUMB SHIT FR0M LAST YEAR RESURFACING S0 IM JUST TRYING T0 NIP SHIT IN THE BUTT N0W. Y0U THINK Y0U KN0W ME BUT Y0U HAVE N0 IDEA & THATS WHERE M0ST 0F MY LIFE PR0BLEMS HAVE STARTED FR0M; THE FACT THAT N0 0NE UNDERSTANDS ME S0 THEY PAINT A PICTURE 0F ME THAT IS SIMPLY A CARICATURE, EXAGGERATION, & A FUCKING MISCONCEPTION. I D0NT LIKE MEN CAUSE I D0NT HAVE A FATHER & GR0WING UP 0NE BOY C0ULDNT KEEP HIS PAW 0F ME LONG ENOUGH FOR ME TO TELL THE DIFFERNCE BETWEEN LOVE, LUST, & M0LESTATION. THE TRUE DEFINITION 0F A SICK CHILDH00D.

N0W EVERY MAN THAT HAS ENTERED MY LIFE HAS HURT ME 0N LEVELS I DIDNT EVEN KN0W EXISTED & ALL I CAN D0 IS C0NTINUE D0WN A PAINFUL SPIRAL 0F BAD "RELATI0NSHIPS". THATS WHAT WE ARE GONNA CALL THEM SINCE I HAVENT BEEN 0N A DATE BUT HAVE SWALLOWED NUT FROM A FEW & HAD "RELATIONS" WITH MORE. JUST A SIMPLE FLAW IN MY OWN HUMAN NATURE. MY HEART GET IN THE WAY OF MY LIFE CONSTANTLY. SOMETIMES I WHICH IT CAME WITH A SWITCH.

SIDEBAR: HUMAN NATURE IS THE ANTI CHRIST .. IT HIT ME WHILE I LAYED ON MY BEDROOM FL00R .. BUT BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND. I MEAN ITS '09 CAN I GET MY LIFE T0GETHER ..